FAITH doesn’t make sense. (At least it feels that way sometimes!)
I wish I could say that I’ve always stepped out in faith when God called me to act, but in all honesty, there have been times when I’ve run hard in the opposite direction! Thankfully, God is a God of second chances.
I don’t pretend to be an expert on faith, but I have learned a few things along the way as I’ve encountered two different types of faith scenarios in my life. I call these ‘faith steps’.
The first type of faith step occurs when the thing God asks of us doesn’t seem unusually overwhelming or monumental. Even though it requires a faith decision, and we may be a little hesitant and somewhat unsure, this type of faith step doesn’t feel so earth shattering. We may not have all the answers and it may be something a little out of our normal spiritual pattern, but the step makes sense. It doesn’t shake you to the core.
But then there’s the other type of faith step . . .
Sometimes God asks us to jump head first into a God-sized calling with no steady ground on which to plant our feet. It’s the white-knuckled, way-out-of-my-comfort-zone crazy thing that God says to do.
And we are petrified! (Or at least I am!)
This is what I call crazy faith.
And trust me, I’m an expert at making Moses-type excuses. Or better yet, you can find me in my pj’s under my favorite quilt with a Godiva chocolate bar, 2 scoops of salted caramel ice cream, and a Nicholas Sparks novel.
My rational mind is pleading, “God, please just let me hide here a while where it’s safe and comfortable. Because you see, Lord, I’m not ready for crazy faith.”
But my heart . . . well, that’s a different story. It feels like it’s beating outside my chest – God’s promises mingled with pure dread!
I don’t always make the hard choice. Sometimes my mind wins, and I stay tucked warmly under my quilt while missing out on God’s amazing plan. But if I pull away the blanket of excuses and doubts, my heart knows that jumping head first with crazy faith is better than sitting safe and cozy.
In my life, that’s what this blog is . . . a crazy faith step into something totally out of my comfort zone. My heart and mind have battled for over 6 months, fighting the Holy Spirit every step of the way. But today, my heart won out, and I’ve never been such a nervous wreck! You can’t imagine how hard it was for me to hit the ‘publish’ button and actually allow this blog to be viewed. I literally stared at the screen in pure terror, and prayed for the rapture to take place!
I have no idea what I’m doing. Really. This is all foreign to me.
But here’s what I’ve learned:
If our desire is to truly live out the dreams God has for us, sometimes we’ve just got to jump into His calling. And sometimes it’s crazy!
We can settle for chocolate and a quilt, or we can live out the crazy, what-am-I-doing-here God-thing.
As for me, I’m choosing the crazy jump! (And maybe just a little chocolate for the road!)